Today has really been one of these days where I just want to sit inside my house and watch sad movies, so I have an excuse of why I am crying. I think I have reached my break down point in this deployment. The time where I have had enough of it and I just want my husband home. I have been nothing but positive through this whole thing so far and It is now hitting me harder than ever. The fact that I have not heard a single thing from my husband in three days does not help either. I know he is on the horrible schedule right now, but he usually sends me a FB message. I haven't even gotten that. It really sucks because all I have are negative thoughts going through my head. Did I do something wrong, is he mad at me, is he okay, is he even still at the same location. I know I should not sit here and blame myself but it is the only thing that keeps running through my head. I know it makes it even worse when I do blame myself. I just want to talk to hear from him. I know I probably sound like a horrible person because there are many of you wives/significant other that go days to weeks without talking to your man. I think this is just so hard for me because I am use to us talking everyday. I never thought that I would sleep with my phone by my head on loud, and with my FB always pulled up along with skype. Man I sound pitiful.
So I am taking my day to sit at home and do nothing, but be lazy. there was so much that I wanted to do today, but I just do not have any motivation to do any of it all. School is definitely out of the question, even though I really need to do it. I am just going to sit on the couch and cuddle with the animals, the ones I know that can listen to me when ever I need them. : )
I think the way you're feeling is completely normal girl. I haven't seen you in a while so we all need to get together soon. He will be home before you know it!
ReplyDeleteAw. I love you Michel! I hope your day gets better. We're going to need to hang out a ton when my mom leaves. Just remember that you're a strong beautiful woman and you have every right to be emotional. You have done amazingly with this deployment so don't let a breakdown here and there get you down. If you need anything whatsoever don't hesitate to call. Feel free to come over later if ya want.
ReplyDeleteseriously, its refreshing to hear that someone else feels the way i do!
ReplyDeletei had gotten so use to talking to my man at least once every single day, which has now recently changed. im lucky if i even get a FB message.
remember, keep your chin up and smile. it will be over before you know it. your fellow milspouses/bloggers/friends are here :)
Best Wishes from England x
Keeping you in my thoughts! You can make it through, i Know its hard! They are probably just having a blackout in internet service,one of my best friends is over there and it happens ;)
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